My love/hate relationship with Ikea

SNL and I stopped at Ikea when we were in Pittsburgh. I have a love/hate relationshp with Ikea. I love their merchandise, I hate the Ikea experience. Our trip to Pittsburgh was motivated by our desire to go to Ikea and that fact that they don't do an online business. I have wanted this Hella Jongerius vase for like ever.

Funny thing, perspective. I've seen this vase a million times in the virtual world. And I have coveted her. I was shocked how huge and heavy she is. I expected a much more tender vase. This vase belongs in the virtual world. My nephews approached the vase scientifically, and measured her to be sure. We all concurred - she's too big for my apartment.

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Now mind you, I am not bitter that I sent Ikea an application and they sent me a no thank you letter without ever talking to me. I had a great time photographing everything. I adored the Knubbig lamps. Should have bought one.

Saw a cute teapot, pillow, picnic ware, chair and curtain. I must admit, I always thought the Klippan sofa looked cheap. But - I almost shit when I saw it in orange vinyl. Fab!
I adore the Ljusas Uvas lamp. Hmm. This might look good with my red Danish sofa.

I almost bought a couple of the Gronos. Should have.

Stupid me. I have been wanting a tall lamp shade forever, and haven't been able to find one. I love the 16-inch yellow Skimra. My shopping experience was not a good one, I was overwhelmed, and did I mention that the customer service was deplorable?

Here's what I did buy. I've been wanting to add some lavender to my apartment. The two little flower pots were $1.99 and are the most wonderful matte finish. The Salong vase is very sexy. The Lykta lamp is cute, but a tease. It cost $12.99 and I can't find a bulb to fit.

I've already spent $12 on bulbs, so I may just give it up. The lady at Home Depot assured me that the bulb to the right would fit, but it did not. I stopped at a chandelier shop, they told me about a shop across town. This is getting stupid. I may give up.

I guess the key to Ikea is plan in advance. If I had it to do over, I'd like get the tall shade and couple of the Knubbig lamps. I am not sure that I ever want to set foot in Ikea again. And don't give me the crap about the lack of customer service keeping costs down. That's one of the many things wrong with America. Hire some people, treat them well. Then treat your customers well. People will spend more money. And those new employees will also spend money and everyone will be happier. It's not rocket science.

Ikea actually did me a favor by snubbing me. I've had extensive customer service training, and I treat people well, especially when they are spending their hard-earned money. I don't belong there. Today at Pat Catan's, I mentioned the lamp saga to one of the clerks. She said, "You could make a lamp for under $10 and I could show you how." Now that's customer service.