2008 was a difficult year for me. I started the year with an easy job that I didn't really want to leave. But it didn't pay enough and I had no health insurance. I got in serious trouble when I needed medical care. I was unemployed for a time, and then I landed a high paying job that will eventually give me a heart attack. 2008 was a year spent mostly worrying. The good thing that came out of it is that I got so sick of worrying, I just stopped. I don't really worry anymore. It's too draining.
The bad thing that came out of all that stress is that my painting suffered. I didn't paint much last year, so my soul suffered. The ideas continue to flow, but I don't have much time. When I do have time, I'm tired. Painting makes me happy, and conversely, my best work comes out of joy.
I suppose this happens to all artists - I feel like quitting. The next couple of posts will focus on the act of painting, as I try to remind myself that the journey is more important than the destination.
I would love to hear from other artists? Do you ever feel like quitting?
3 comments:
Yeah, I sometimes get that feeling... of wanting to quit as well. =(
First you doubt, then procrastinate, then you start finding all sorts of excuses to not pick up your brush...then weeks pass, and for some reason, you pick up that brush and paint again. I think it is an impulse...to create.
Yes, I'm in that place right now. I just spent a year in developing my new body of work. Leaving behind representational work after over 15 years of painting. I'm still where I was years ago in trying to get known and truly represented by a gallery.
My sweetheart has spoken to me about this and has been with me for over seven years and hasn't seen any real results. Sure a few sales here and there; but nothing else. My job is great, it pays the bills and supports my art. I have good people on my staff and I look forward to going in everyday doing satisfying work. My art career is becoming the stress that I thought my work would be. Not the case.
My art is good with nice praise but sometimes that's just not enough. Some would say just suck it up and stop whining. Well, you also have to know when to call it quits. Consider your options.
For me this has brought into question is this really worth it (I'm sure it is) and so I'm considering at least a hiatus from it for a year and regroup focus on other things and just take a pause. This may disappoint some and really dismay others. But they just don't know what it's like.
Good luck to you.
All the time...
I feel that everything i do isn´t relevant...
I just can´t do it good enough...
So... if it makes me feel bad, more than it makes me feel happy...why do i keep going? I guess i just have that need...but i wish i didn´t...
all the time...
Good luck
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