Love your haters

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED 9/30/13


Dear readers, as you know, I've been in deep prayer and meditation for the past several weeks.  I am happy to report that I am feeling better than ever, and have never been happier.  The intense introspection was painful at times, I discovered parts of myself that I didn't like, but with God's help I am working hard to eradicate those qualities. I'd like to thank my haters for causing me to pause, humble up and examine my life.  I have emerged stronger than ever before.

Also, out of this time period came a very prolific artistic period.  I started giving away paintings.  I never did paint for money - which is a good thing because no one wanted to pay me for a painting. I painted because I love it.  My only criteria for a painting was that the new owner love it.  I took great pains to be sure that each painting went to a loving home.  They are my children, after all.

I had been sad that I could no longer use acrylic due to an allergy.  But.  Clearing out the paintings felt good. I felt lighter and now had room to create new art!  And it doesn't matter what medium I use, as long as I create.  I create because I must.  It's that simple.   I've been very prolific over the past several weeks.  I could barely keep up with my various muses.

Over the next few days I will be revealing my new art, and the direction I am taking.  Then we will be discussing colors - aren't all the bright colors fantastic?  They look really fab tempered with gray.  One of my favorite color combos is neon coral pink and gray.  Also love mint green and gray.  Teal and gray.  Orange and gray.....you get the idea.

Once we've discussed colors, I will reveal my apartment.  I have worked hard on my apartment to create a beautiful, edgy, girly pad that doubles as an efficient work space.  Not easy in 450 square feet with small closets.  Fortunately, I am resourceful.  There will be plenty of tips on organization.

Also, don't forget to check out my urban photojournal.  I've been taking a lot of pictures lately.  Politics aside for now, let's have some fun!

Stay tuned, cuz you're gonna hear me roar.

Katy Perry, you are fabulous!  Thanks for being an inspiration.  You go girl!

Processing - Weekend Vignettes and Preparing to Make Art

Dear readers, I can't believe it's Wednesday already!  Where does the time go?  I had a busy three day weekend creating art.  I'd love to share my processing and how it's going to impact my decor for Fall.  I hope you will take this journey with me.  Creativity is fun!  There is nothing I enjoy more than creating art and decorating my humble apartment.  And as you know, I do it with no money, and stuff I already have in my closet.  Let's have some fun, shall we?

I elected to create without music this time, not sure why.  Wanted the quiet, but that was almost impossible because the Blue Angels were in town for Labor Day, and flying right over my head.  It literally sounds like the sky is opening up when they fly by.  I thought they'd drive me crazy, but when I went into my art zone I was able to tune them out.  I had a minimal painting in my mind.  A shape, and a color that haunts. Still staying away from toxins at the moment, so I knew I'd have to get inventive with markers, cut paper and maybe crayons.  As you know, when I am processing I start by moving things around things in my apartment and experimenting with different vignettes.  I need the perfect balance.  To set the stage, so to speak.

 

I've been wanting to experiment with more organic touches, and I found this vase at the Dollar Store.  Yep.  I paid $1.00 for it.  I've been wanting something wood, and am really digging the idea of wooden bowls right now.  Actually, I'm not even sure it's real wood, it might be resin.  It's still kinda cool and a pretty shaped vase.  I'm not sure I like it in my space, though.  Maybe it's for Haley's loft.  Or maybe I should spray paint it white?  I really wanted these beautiful vases from Chiasso, but I didn't want to spend the money.

Aren't they gorgeous?  Maybe I can spray paint my new vase in a pearly glaze and it would look similar to these.  Oh wait.  Spray paint is a toxin.  Darn.

You know, I've never really been interested in jewelry or diamonds, although I do love costume jewelry.  I don't need fine jewels, but I love Tiffany boxes.  The color is so beautiful.  I love the way that color pops off the pink vases.  These boxes are part of an installation piece I am working on.  Installation art is madly fascinating.  The preparation of an installation can utterly absorb me and become the dominating force in my life.  It's like being in a trance, and it's pure heaven.  I need a Betsey Johnson hot pink box for this installation but - you guessed it - I don't want to spend the money.  Betsey is totally fab, though.  I've written about her on this blog several times (see previous posts here).

My sister-in-law and I recently did a Target run.  It was odd, now that I'm not in corporate America, I don't do Target runs with the same regularity.  And I don't really miss it.  Now that the Target close to my home is one of those mega-huge stores, the inventory is not what it was.  The smaller store (now closed) had better and edgier buyers.  This large store has become rather, um, homogenized.  Hate to say it.  Not really faulting them, we need design for the masses, but I think they need to step up their game a little (although I am digging these pillows they have, lamp from Habitat).  Sorry, I digress.  Anyway, the chair was on sale for $7.00.  It was great sitting on my deck tonight.  I love the cooler weather we've been having.  Fall is my favorite time of year.

Remember my last incarnation of my living room?  This is number 16.  When I look at this picture I am bothered by the lack of balance on either side of the sofa.  That little table really doesn't work, but it will have to do.  I want an over sized lamp and some intentional distortion of scale, but I still feel like the little table  needs something larger.  Since the lamp is tall, maybe I'll move it to the small table.  It casts a beautiful, romantic glow at night, so it's probably good to have it in the corner anyway.  How to make this area look more balanced with a little table that's not really working?  Stay tuned for my next reveal. 

I went to the closet to pull out some of my vases.  Here is the new vignette on the table, but who knows how it will look tomorrow.  Now, that I have some balance, it's time to make art.

New Paintings ... and a Few Words about Creative Process

The life of an artist is a funny thing.  Creative process is something that must be surrendered to.  Most of my life I have been in situations where I was the square peg trying to fit into a round hole.  I never could quite adjust to the rhythms, imbalance and harshness of corporate America.  I tried over and over again, and exhausted myself (and almost died of illness) in the process.  Then there was the guilt.  Guilt about the fact that I was unsuccessful.  Guilt that I didn't even really want how corporate America defined success.  And shame.  I was ashamed that I was a "failure" and beat myself up constantly because I should be more.

After so much soul searching, I've come to realize a few things.  One model does not fit all.  We each have our own rhythm.  And what if we are okay just the way we are?  What are we striving for?  Who are we trying to impress?  These days, I am interested in living simply and in honoring my natural rhythms.

Last summer I had the wonderful opportunity of working at an internship with the fabulous installation artist Olga Ziemska.  I was fascinated by Olga because she was supporting herself as an artist.    I once asked her about procrastination, laziness and lack of discipline.  All things I was guilty of in my opinion, and for which I beat myself up ruthlessly.  She explained to me that there was no separation between her life and art.    Her life was her art.  Her art was her life.  And that she honored her natural rhythms.  She created when she needed to.  Rested without guilt when she needed to - what a concept!  Ate when she needed to.  I began to understand the work/live space of an artist and how important it is to the creative process.  Virginia Woolf had that right.  A woman - especially a creative one - must have a space of her own.

Another artist I have come to know owns a popular vintage shop in town.  He's up at the crack of dawn hitting the flea markets, garage sales and thrift stores.  He's always got upcycling projects going on in his studio, and he's always rearranging his shops and does the most beautiful window display.  When I asked him about this discipline, he said simply, "I live this stuff."  It's his life.  There is no separation.

In my own creative work, I've come to realize it does not abide by a clock.  It comes when it wants and wanes when it wants.  I am merely the conduit.  Sometimes my process is almost manic and I can't keep up with the ideas I'm flooded with.  That's one thing I've been blessed with.  I never want for inspiration.  Lately, the muses are very active, and I am prolific.  I had a painting marathon this week, and I'd like to humbly offer some of my new work.

Untitled, 2011, 24" x 24".  A clear imitation of Piet Mondrian's work.  I have been more and more interested in color blocking of late, and Mondrian is one of my favorite artists.  I love this type of simple, geometric art.  Aesthetically it is my favorite, I like to hang this type of art in my apartment.  But I find this type of work tedious to execute.  It must be perfect.  One line out of place ruins it.  It takes time and patience.  It's simple looking, but not easy to execute.  Mondrian often used primary colors in his work.  I have replaced the red with fuchsia, and the primary blue with baby blue.

Untitled, 18" x 30", acrylic on canvas.  As you know, I always have more than one canvas going at a time.  When I am working on an exacting, geometric piece, I also do a piece just for fun.  It's highly experimental, almost the antithesis of the geometric work.  It helps to free up the creativity, and helps to break the binding feeling of perfectionism.  I like some parts of this one, especially the lower right corner where I have some organic plant growing.  For some reason these types of paintings always have vaginas all over the place.  I assure you, it's unintentional.  I enjoy this type of work, but don't like to hang it in my apartment.  I prefer simplicity.

Untitled, 24" x 24", acrylic and marker on canvas.  And speaking of simplicity, I also executed this painting.  It's, of course, influenced by a popular painting of Warhol and is an attempt to paint intentionally like a child.  Have you ever tried to paint like a child?  It's not easy!

 

Untitled, 16" x 20" print.  This is actually a digital rendering of my blotter board.  I often get fascinated by the patterns my blotter makes.  When processing this work, I got caught up with the negative space.  I will probably reproduce this work on a large canvas.  And there it is, too many words.  Art just is.  And artists, well, we create because we must.

through tears, or i see in color

Art is unexplainable. Yet, in our humanness we constantly attempt to explain it. I'm not sure why. Perhaps it's a compulsion borne of being wired for language. I've always looked at things strangely. I can stare at a wall for long periods of time. What people don't know is that I see colors in movement.Just an ordinary wall, right? But combined with vegetation and wind, it becomes a cacophony of color.

Which I am always trying to translate. This is why movement is a part of my paintings. Because movement is color. Sounds are also colors. This is both blessing and curse. Sometimes I am in awe of the symphony before my eyes. Other times, it overwhelms and nauseates me and I wish I could have a break.

Images by Peggy

Creativity influences creativity

Today was a good day. My dear friend, Buddha, and I went to Starbucks. Then the vintage store, then the craft store. It's great to be around someone who understands me and values my creativity. When we get together, the creative juices start flowing. I tried not to buy too many things. Have you ever noticed that there is no shortage of beautiful things to spend our money on?

I bought a couple of cute, inexpensive flower pots. And discovered when I got home that I have yet another collection! Oh dear, I have a collection of flower pots. They are cute, though. I love the simple forms. Buddha and I have always talked about our love of color. I've spoken of my love for pink and she's spoken of her love for blue. Now I'm a convert. I love blue. She's a convert too, she loves pink.

I bought this blue bracelet at the vintage store. It was inexpensive and lightweight, almost like melamine. I love decorating with costume jewelry. I like these three pieces together because they are all vintage, from around the same time period.

I talked and talked about blogging, and how much I love it. It felt good, and I promised Buddha some pictures of a few of my favorite rooms, so here they are.

I want to paint my apartment this color! What a gorgeous blue, looks great with the pink sofa. Image via flickr user Retromod. Retromod has a great home. Lots of great mid-century finds, and wonderful colors.

Retromod is skilled at display. I think I need one of these hands for displaying my vintage bracelets.

Lastly, I promised Buddha I'd show her a room all done in blue. Isn't this gorgeous! I love monochrome. I love that painting. Image via House of Turquoise. My creative juices are flowing and it feels good. Excuse me, a canvas is calling.