Brief Hiatus and Exciting Announcement

Sorry for the brief interruption of posts.  I don't need to explain to you, dear readers, how life is.  Busy.  Seems time rushes by and we lead such harried lives.  I'm excited to announce that I will be moving (yes, again).  After several years of transition, unemployment and illness, good fortune has smiled on me.  I have been given an opportunity to feel more settled.  I will fill you in on all the details at a later date.

As I look back on the last couple of difficult and tumultuous years, I can clearly see that I am always taken care of by God, Higher Power or the Cosmos, whatever you prefer to call it.  I can also clearly see that everything happens for a reason.  Even the difficult things.  I am a better, stronger and more peaceful person.

I am leaving my beloved Cleveland again.  I wouldn't be surprised if I return one day.  I definitely will be visiting.  There are exciting things happening in Cleveland.  In the meantime, I have been purging like crazy.  I have been ruthless in my editing, and yet it seems there is still so much stuff.  As you know, I've never really been a pack rat or a hoarder.  I like a clean, simple aesthetic. I'm trying harder than I ever have to live simpler.  The funny thing is that the simpler I make my life, the happier I am.  I still love beautiful things and, of course, am obsessing about decorating my new lovely, small, humble apartment.  And, of course, I will be sharing all my musings on simplicity and decor with you.

One of the things I purged was my boxes of journals.  I had been keeping journals for the last 20 years.  As I looked back on them, I saw destructive and repetitive patterns that, I am proud to say are no longer a part of my life.  I am no longer a victim, and am living an authentic life with integrity.  It felt great letting them go.  Closing one chapter of my life and welcoming the next.

I will be offline for a short time.  But stay tuned, I will be asking Jessie to guest blog again (although she is busy too!).  I have lots of interesting things to report when I return, such as thoughts on organic decor, uber simplicity and new art projects.  In the meantime just for fun, I'll leave you with some fab chicks on fab red sofas.

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The always fabulous Kate Winslet.  Is it just me, or does she keep getting better and better?  Okay, let's balance this with a cute guy.

The chair is not red, but it is fab.  And designer extraordinaire, Antonio Ballatore, looks fab in it.

P.S. Have you ever watched Clean House?  I've been watching it marathon style on Netflix while packing and organizing.  I love the team's campy sense of humor.  Designer Mark Brunetz and I share the love of clutter-free simplicity.  He is such a hottie and I just learned that he is a Cleveland native!  I'd love to meet him!

Take care, dear readers!  See you soon.  xxoo

Letting go, part two

Here's the first large thing I've let go. My television and DVD player. This baby was the shit in its day, although it obsoleted quickly. I found it on the curb, only cost a couple dollars to fix, it was just a wire. It was cool to have the VCR and TV in one compact unit. I never bought video tapes, they were too bulky. I watched many movies for free from the library. I always hated going to the video store. Too noisy, and too much pressure to watch the movie quickly. Cable TV was a waste of money for me, so I turned it off years ago. I've never actually been a TV viewer. The only show I remember following was the Brady Bunch. I've never seen Seinfeld, nor Friends. I hate the manipulation of episodic TV, don't tell me where I have to be at 9:00 on Monday. I've never watched the news. Talk about manipulation. I don't like being told what to think. In COM 101 we called it agenda setting.

I'm a movie buff, though. Netflix is an answer to a dream. I watch what I want, when I want. No pressure. Since I watch movies on my computer, the TV isn't necessary. It's funny, for years I have dreamed of living without a TV. I hate the way it ruins a room (although flat screens look much better), and I've admired those few friends who lived without it. Yet, when I let it go, I felt a twinge of sadness, go figure. But my apartment does look a lot airier.

Letting Go

Dear readers, thank you for taking the time to read my blog. How much personal business we should share on our blogs is a discussion bloggers engage in frequently. Indeed, my favorite blogs are the ones where I feel like I get to know the writers because they share a little of their lives. Through blogging, I have gained a network of friends who share my interests. People who understand me, and who are a constant source of support.

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As you probably know, I've been going through a strange illness for over a year now. It's something rare, and I am fortunate to have the best doctors caring for me. But they are stumped and there's little they can do to help. I am attempting natural treatments. I lost my job late last year, and thank God for ARRA passed by President Obama. Because the employer is required to subsidize 65% of my COBRA costs, I can afford my health insurance. Still, the price of copays and prescriptions is whopping. Especially without a job.

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Warning! Digression follows. I won't even go into the vast corruption of Sallie Mae and how they are chocking me. I'm college-educated, which was a difficult feat. I worked fulltime, and put myself through college. Instead of being rewarded for my tenacity, I am treated like a criminal. Listen kids, go to school however you can. But don't borrow the money from the government. Please send me an email if you want more information or if you've experienced difficulty with Sallie Mae. If you've had a serious illness, you already know how in shambles our medical care is in this country. There are not enough doctors. If you are interested, here is an article about a woman who put herself through medical school and how she is being treated (link). It's appalling! Why are we as a society treating people this way? We must be educated. It's a necessity. But we can't make it impossible for people to get educated and then penalize those few who actually make it through the quagmire of higher education. America will not be a super power in short order if we continue in this fashion. End digression.

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For the first time in my life, I have had to ask my family for help. It was very difficult for me to reach out, I am used to being strong and independent. I may be moving into my brother's home. He has a lovely home in a quiet neighborhood. The thought of potentially giving up my independence scares me. And, of course, letting go of my humble little apartment is sad. I've loved living here, and this little apartment has spurred so much creativity.

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At the same time I'm feeling optimistic. What better time for new beginnings than Spring? Perhaps some good can come from the economic downturn. Perhaps we've become too much of an individuated society. Perhaps that lifestyle is not sustainable. Perhaps we can learn to come together with our loved ones to share resources, while maintaining our precious individualism.

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Perhaps it will be wonderful living in a house. I have lived in apartments all my life. I wonder what it will be like not to sleep with street lights blaring in the windows and sirens and helicopters piercing the night. I wonder what it will be like to park in a driveway and not have to carry groceries several blocks and then up three flights of stairs. I wonder what it will be like not to worry if I will step in dog shit or cigarette butts every time I step out of my building. I wonder what it will be like not to have to worry that there will be a homeless person in the laundry room, or if I will encounter someone bleeding on my doorstep. Because that's what it's like when the rent is cheap.

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Perhaps it will be heaven. I thank God for my family. I have felt sorry for myself for a long time for being single. How naive. The qualities I have looked for in a man, I am finding in my family. There it was under my nose all the time. I feel loved and protected. And time. Well, it's precious. Much too precious to waste being miserable or being with someone who treats you badly.

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As you know, I've been getting a jump on Spring cleaning and downsizing a bit in anticipation of a move. If I do move, there will be a lot more downsizing. It feels good, stuff can be such a burden. I have to admit that I am a collector, and even if I just have a small room, I can make it beautiful. I'll be blogging about this process. I hope you will join me on this journey. xxoo

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[Post dedicated to Jessie of My Mod Style.]